RamsThoughts

December 31, 2007 1:58 pm

Parenting: Lies to Toddlers?

Filed under: Parenting,Personal — ramsblog @ 1:58 pm

I myself felt guilty these days for lying to my 2yr old toddler. I agree it depends on whether there was any reason behind lying on certain circumstances. I am also afraid of any consequence from such. There have been many instances where I had to do so for her to learn new things or help us help her in certain circumstances.

a. I often tell her that my cell phone needed to be charged when she wanted that phone. [underlying reason: I didn’t want her to drop or break my phone]

b. Now-a-days she is more into become taller so that she can reach things at home. So we tell her to eat the right food so that she can become taller. So every time the topic comes up, she says, “I eat lentils so I can become taller” (wink)

 c.   We had a family guest few months ago. When they were about to leave, our toddler started crying that she wanted to go with them. We said, they didn’t have a car seat and they would bring it back the next time so that she can go with them. However, every time we take their name, she says, they are going to bring in a Car seat so that she could with them. (wink)

 d.  We had been to our friend’s place a week ago. She enjoyed playing with the kids there. It was about 11:15 at night and we headed out. She refused to join us and wanted to stay back at their place. It took about 15 – 20minutes to convince her and still didn’t work. Finally I said, they were going to follow us in their car and convinced her to sit in our car. We couldn’t expect them to follow us. (wink)

There are many such instances…Is it right thing to do so? I know, it is Parenting101 that I need to learn further to be a better parent to our toddler. I have known from back home, that the toddlers are fed showing them the Moon (ಚಂದಮಾಮ) – so in a process have the kid diverted to a different topic and feed him as appropriate.  We have several stories from the epics of similar instances from the days of SriKrishna and SriRama. So my interpretation was it was ok to divert the Kids with the right intentions in our mind and for Kids’ wellbeing.

 

I noticed a kannada[link]  poem on Navilagari blog recently. For Non-kannada speakers, to summarize this poem – it talks about how a Mom swallow her challenges and still keeps the child smile and be happy growing up. For the most, a Mom would not share sorrow with her children and children would never know those challenges at all.

 

So Parents, what is the best way to explain toddlers the way they understand and still grow up happy?

 

When I mention these to few people around, they would comment: “this stage shall pass and they will eventually understand. This phase is to enjoy these moments and that’s the all reason they are called Toddlers”. although it makes sense to me at times….

 

🙂

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1 Comment »

  1. God alone must show us the path to fruitful parenting!
    We make mistakes and learn .

    Comment by neel3 — January 4, 2008 7:07 am @ 7:07 am | Reply


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